There is no doubt that there is a struggle between lawyering and life. But it doesn’t have to be that way. There can be more harmony in your life. You and your loved ones deserve it. It can happen—it starts with you! How you think and how you take action. Here are seven strategies to help you navigate more harmony and happiness in your life.
1. Find your north star. What are you passionate about? Think long and hard about this! What calls to you? What keeps crossing your path trying to get your attention?
2. Make a Commitment! Ask yourself if you are really committed or is it just an idea that sounds good?
Wolfgang von Goethe wrote—“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back— Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth that ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.”
3. Examine your assumptions. What assumptions have you made and acted as though they are the truth? Dig deep, they may be buried. Assumptions you made in law school or when you landed your 1st or 2nd legal position. What did you really know back then? Maybe something didn’t work, and you assumed it was because of this or that… was it really?
4. Everyone’s journey is different. You can do it your way! But, not by over thinking it! You analyze, research, contemplate and ask all your friends. That is information overload! Instead trust your gut… and take action. I love Einstein’s words…“I never made one of my discoveries through the process of rational thinking!” Stop over thinking!
5. Tailor your work to fit in harmony with your life. I know this is a hard mindset to alter, because of all the preconceived ideas we hold; work 9-5, work life balance, we shouldn’t make personal calls at work, etc, etc, etc! Work or life; It’s not EITHER/ OR. It’s this AND that. I would suggest, not to focus on the problem, instead—focus on solutions! Find the bridge over the obstacles. Remember when your mother told you, “Don’t drop the milk!” you dropped the milk! She made you focus on the obstacle. I say, focus on solutions! Focus on— How can it work. Not, it will never work!
6. What Fuels your energy, enthusiasm and joy? Think about the feeling of contentment you get when you’re in the zone. When the endorphins are flowing. I’m in the zone when I’m creating books, online coaching programs, blog posts and playing with my photographs for Instagram. They all bring me energy, enthusiasm and joy! What brings you energy, enthusiasm and joy?
7. And most importantly. Take care of yourself—so you can take care of others. There is a reason, that flight attendants tell us—“in case of an emergency, put your mask on first.” You can’t help anyone if you are gasping for air! So, what state do you think you’re in if you don’t eat right, you drink too much or let everyone hijack your time? You, my friend are gasping for air. You can’t be patient when your voice gets loud. You can’t focus and you can’t listen. So be honest, does this help others? Of course not! Self-care is not selfish—it is an act of love for those you care about. And know that it’s okay not to be okay!
Be forgiving of your past self.
Be strict with your present self.
Be flexible with your future self.”
I love this quote by James Clear; the author of Atomic Habits (great book by the way.) Forgive yourself. You did the best you could, and you learned something. Hold yourself accountable to the person you want to be. Approach the future with an open mind ready to see what could be possible.
So, what’s stopping you? If not now—when? When it’s too late? For me—It’s about hunger! A hunger to experience life, more and more! I love what sportswriter, Rick Reilly said about Kobe when he passed…
“Kobe didn’t just live life— he swallowed it whole!”
Why shouldn’t we all want to swallow life whole.
I implore you—take action now. What could your future look like? Take the time to REALLY think about that question!